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Transformers

Published July 2, 2011

Transformers

Film info

  • Title Transformers
  • Director Michael Bay
  • Year 2007
  • Run time 2hrs 22m
  • Genres Science Fiction, Action, Adventure
  • Tagline Their war. Our world.

From director Michael Bay and executive producer Steven Spielberg comes a thrilling battle between the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons. When their epic struggle comes to Earth, all that stands between the Decepticons and ultimate power is a clue held by young Sam Witwicky. Sam and Bumblebee, his robot disguised as a car, are in a heart-pounding race against an enemy unlike anything anyone has seen before.

Live Blog

Time Comment
0:32 These noises are quite creepy.
2:12 I so recognised the Osprey from its shadow. Mr C is a bad influence on me.
3:07 He said: “I just can’t wait to hold my baby girl for the first time.” He’s not going to make it, clearly.
4:56 It’s like Top Gun.
6:42 Okay, so I am new to this Transformers business. What if they didn’t have the right parts to pretend to be a helicopter?
8:54 There’s no way you can fight something like that!
12:08 Serves him right, he’s a bit of a brat.
14:46 Cars pick their drivers. Just like Herbie.
16:53 Their lead is a sound? I can’t see how that is much help.
25:20 Oh my god, she’s annoying.
26:52 Why does the car care if he has a girlfriend?
30:53 “They’re hacking into Air Force One!”
40:27 It doesn’t look much like a helicopter anymore. Where did the rotor bits go?
44:26 Planes can fire from the side?
48:22 “Satan’s Camaro.”
54:58 The one that turns into a hi-fi has sounded both like ET and a Gremlin.
57:01 It was a radio and now its a phone? I don’t get it.
1:00:05 Armageddon! A film reference I get! Woooohoo.
1:01:16 Scariest tooth fairy ever.
1:02:20  You know, Shia LaBoeuf looks like David Platt. I can’t unsee it.
1:03:49 Awkward.
1:06:29 I always knew eBay would be the downfall of us all.
1:10:44 Transformer said: “Sorry, my bad.” Hehehe.
1:12:20 Send the woman to find them, instead of a silly man search.
1:13:21 Optimus Prime is definitely awesome.
1:28:24 Where did all the dry ice come from?
1:30:28 Good grief, no communication at all? No internets?
1:31:31 There is something ABOVE top secret!
1:35:41 You can’t roll out on foot. Silly Transformers.
1:39:56 They are keeping the two strange alien things right next door to each other. Smart.
1:41:34 I wish my phone did that! Maybe with the next Android upgrade.
1:43:46 “I’m gonna count to five.” “I’m gonna count to three.”
1:55:56 It’s hard to feel emotional though. The head of the thing turned into a phone, what’s left of Bumble Bee could turn into something else too.
2:00:14 It’s all very well Prime coming in to save the day. Where was he earlier?
2:12:30 Why didn’t they just shove it in his chest in the Hoover Dam?
2:14:16 He got to hold the baby! I was wrong.

Thoughts

I have never seen the original Transformers series. In fact, I think my only knowledge of the Transformers concept was a weird plane thing that I inherited as a kid, and about two parts moved to make it into a robot. I’ve heard of Megatron but Mr C laughed a lot when I asked about the Decepticles.

I suspect a lot of people were concerned this would ruin their childhood, and thankfully I cannot say one way or the other, having no knowledge of Transformers before this. It wasn’t a bad film, in fact, I feel like it had the potential to be brilliant, but it was let down in a lot of ways.

There are a gazillion plot holes. I felt like I was forced to suspend my belief on top of the suspended belief that comes with an alien robot story. Too many questions, not enough answers, and checking with Mr C showed some inconsistencies that didn’t exist in the TV show era.

It was hard to engage with the film because neither of the lead characters were particularly nice. He was a brat, although brave. She was clearly just cast because she was thin. Whilst I held some respect for Optimus Prime, who seemed cool (I want one!), it’s also hard to be bothered about robots fighting robots for a cube. Particularly when the solution was what it was.

The CGI though, was incredible. I was so impressed. I had some concerns that the fighting would get a bit confusing, just a mess of metal, and whilst that was the case, it was still some pretty impressive footage. Beautiful cinematography too. Just enough good stuff to outweigh the bad, I think.

Rating: 3 / 5

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