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The Family Plan

Published January 20, 2024

The Family Plan

Film info

  • Title The Family Plan
  • Director Simon Cellan Jones
  • Year 2023
  • Run time 1hrs 59m
  • Genres Action, Comedy
  • Tagline Mark your calendar, plan your getaway

Dan Morgan is many things: a devoted husband, a loving father, a celebrated car salesman. He’s also a former assassin. And when his past catches up to his present, he’s forced to take his unsuspecting family on a road trip unlike any other.

Live blog

Time Comment
1:24 Car sales bullshit is a very specific type.
6:48 “We always have tacos on Wednesdays.” “Well, Tuesday’s everybody is doing it.”
17:50 Half a million for a new life is huge.
20:47 “You don’t pay me to lie.”
22:24 Loving him being an Adele fanboi.
28:39 OMG, four phones just went out the window.
35:35 Fun to have a car chase to the soothing sounds of Enya.
44:03 “So, you’re just… German?”
53:59 “They might think something’s up when they have to change their name and leave the country.”
58:43 America can be so beautiful in places!
1:04:58 He should just say he’s done a lot of Duolingo.
1:15:14 Good luck finding an exit in a casino.
1:32:15 The Sphere being built in the background.
1:46:43 “There’s nine other events, bitch.”
1:52:45 His name actually is Van!

Thoughts

This film isn’t particularly smart or clever and it’s derivative of many other movies but it is a fun, easy-going experience with Marky Mark being his effortless charming self. The whole thing feels like a million other movies, and then there are specific moments (fighting with a baby is so Jason Statham, you know?) but if you just switch off your brain and go with it, it’s an entertaining way to spend a couple of hours.

Rating: 2 / 5

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