Click & Collect

Published December 28, 2018

Click and collect

The BBC aired a one-off hour-long comedy this Christmas, starring Stephen Merchant and Asim Choudry as an unlikely duo travelling hundreds of miles to find a sought-after toy for the former’s kid, and featuring plenty of humour and emotional moments along the way. I loved it so much, I wished I was Film Watching it as I went along - then I realised, I can sort of do that anyway! Ah, having a blog is excellent.

So, here are my favourite bits and pieces from Click & Collect:

  • “£64.99? Sorry, is it an actual unicorn?”
  • The lights! They so remind me of Christmas Lights, that programme with Robson Green and Mark Benton. Oof that was a good show.
  • Do people honk their horns at lights? That’s not something I’d ever think of doing.
  • “I have turned to my superpower, the strongly worded letter.”
  • When people pretend to be on the phone, it always stresses me out that it will ring.
  • “It’s not a list of demands, like a ransom note. The list is there for us to just cast an eye over, thanks very much for your suggestions, we’ll take it from here sweetheart.”
  • I really want a Brief History of Time colouring book.
  • “You can’t put a price on her happiness, can you?” “No, you can’t, but then her happiness will be heavily discounted on Boxing Day.”
  • The fizzed up drink is amazing. “That’s the gas out of it now.” Then the wipers!
  • “We need to show it that we mean business.” Then later. “The balls on this thing, mate!” Ah, sat nav.
  • The handbrake thing confused me for a second there, but omg.
  • I think I have a bit of a phobia about things that make noise when the battery runs out… it’s freaking me out.
  • “Just one retweet from a Lineker, a Rowling, an Edmonds!”
  • Always when the person is like “what more could you do” and then you just have to keep on going.
  • “We have clicked and now we have come to collect.”
  • “That was amazing. Honestly, and I don’t say this lightly, you reminded me of Lovejoy.”
  • I don’t totally understand when they got their car back, but oh well.
  • “It’s very unusual for me to write directly to clients.” “Children?”
  • Love that Santa is blaming Brexit.
  • “Because of me, tomorrow, she’s going to open a chemistry set. Which, let’s face it, is basically just extra school.”
  • Argh, the strongly-worded letter!
  • “Why are you dressed like a big elf?” “It’s a valid question.”
  • Banta Claus.
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