The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard

Published August 3, 2021

The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard

Film info

  • Title The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard
  • Director Patrick Hughes
  • Year 2021
  • Run time 1hr 40m
  • Genres Comedy, Action, Thriller
  • Tagline Killer threesome

The world's most lethal odd couple - bodyguard Michael Bryce and hit man Darius Kincaid - are back. Still unlicensed, Bryce is forced into action by Darius's wife, the infamous international con artist Sonia Kincaid. As Bryce is driven over the edge by the volatile spouses, the trio get in over their heads in a global plot and soon find that they are all that stand between Europe and a vengeful and powerful madman.

Live blog

Time Comment
1:07 Bodyguard of the Year awards… that’s not real, right?
5:00 “You’ve graduated therapy.”
10:32 I hate the sound of guns pinging underwater.
15:14 “We work with the bad guys to get the worse guys.”
19:40 Anyone BUT!
30:50 We are hopping all around the globe here.
39:47 So many reporters, useful for exposition.
43:39 “I’m not wearing a sports bra!” Yay, at last talking about the real issues in a car chase.
46:04 I wonder if anyone has studied how many helicopters in films actually make it through without crashing.
50:36 Don’t make me argue about who the best bodyguard in the world is.
55:29 “I cry sometimes when I’m… awake.”
1:01:52 Cha cha chamber.
1:12:54 Overboard’s getting great reviews in this movie.
1:24:05 Pepper spray for the win!


Okay, I wasn’t expecting this to be good. So while I was watching it, I actually found it to be more entertaining than I’d thought it would be. Some of the moments between Ryan and Samuel are really quite funny. BUT. But but but. The plot is ridiculous, zipping about the globe and leaving absolute devastation, plot holes and confusion in its wake.

It’s almost trying so hard that it becomes a spoof… feeling almost like Austin Powers as it drew towards a conclusion, and I really don’t think it was meant to be that kind of comedy. So, if you haven’t seen it yet, I would steer well clear.

Rating: 1 / 5

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