The Archers - May 2010

Published June 7, 2010

May saw a lot more going on than in the previous few months, as some of the slow-burning storylines begin to come to fruition. Starting with, of course, Lillian, Paul and Matt. The love triangle. Can I just officially say - Lillian and Paul = bleurgh! He was so disgustingly soppy, and she was right there with him. Eventually, she chose Matt but I would gladly have those two minutes of my life back, please.

So, with Matt now out of jail, and on the defensive regarding his girlfriend and what she’s been up to, what better way to bolster a relationship than to become partners in business as well as in life? I never thought I would say this but Lillian needs to start listening to Brian. The man can see right through his ex-colleague and into the future - where it all ends in tears.

Thus, on to another Archer who is blinded by love - Pip. You get the feeling she’s starting to see through whatever it was that made her find Jude attractive. Bit by bit, he begins to take her for granted, forget his phone when she needs him, and essentially destroy her chances at good results. The girl even slept through some exams and had to call on Aunt Elizabeth to help her out. By the way, Nigel made the best argument ever over Elizabeth’s interfering by pointing out she wouldn’t like it if David started advising her how to raise the twins. Do they actually have names, by the way? I have only heard them referred to as “the twins.” Nevertheless, Elizabeth did interfere, and David snapped his way through a conversation with her. Elizabeth thought he was being nasty. I think he could have been a lot worse!

The Single Wicket competition was a blinding success, no thanks to Alistair, it seems. If they really were having such a problem in getting people to sign up to take part, why not open it up to people outside of Ambridge? Problem solved. You get more people in, more people to use the new village shop, more people to take a drink in The Bull. Instead, it was used as a plot device so that Harry could move in to said Bull with the lovely Fallon. Only she can see how excellent he is, at everything. DIY. Cricket. Milk rounds. Poor Jazzer doesn’t stand a chance.

Just a couple of other things to note this month: I was so hoping Vicky wouldn’t be successful. It’s nice that she wanted to save the bull calves, but it rides roughshod over the fact that it just isn’t a profitable business. If she does get Tom Archer’s business, then it’s congratulating her on just being really, very annoying, and I don’t want Ed to be proven wrong. He was doing what’s best for the business, she just got lucky.

Someone else who was lucky - Helen is finally pregnant, it must have been all that positive thinking. It’s nice that she acknowledged the luck involved. Some of the message boards on the Beeb are not at all impressed with this story - it appears to make the donor process easy peasy, when it really isn’t as simple, or quick, as signing up and bam, a baby.

Finally, Tom and Brenda? Kill me. Whine, whine, whine. There was no milk. There were no jacket potatoes. She might end up under a lorry on the motorway. Did Tom really jump to those conclusions the minute Brenda said she might be sharing a house with a man? I hate him. And I hate her for putting up with him.

Although he did give the line of the month when Helen told him she was pregnant and he said: “Oh, Helen, I’m sorry.” Classic.

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