Title: Avengers Assemble Director: Joss Whedon Year: 2012 Run time: 2hrs 23m
It’s fair to say that we were both quite excited about watching this. We’ve waited and waited for it to wend its way to iTunes, and finally, lo and behold, there it was. We’ve put the ground work in, too, watching all the individual movies over the last few months. Actually, we probably watched them too many months ago and have forgotten it all. Anyway, we know it did amazingly well in terms of Box Office, and the reviews I’ve heard have pretty much all been positive. I couldn’t wait to see it for myself!
1:36 - I love it when they say: “This is not a drill.” 4:15 - A doorway to the other end of space. Cooool. 7:01 - Thor got an axe, Loki got a spear. 8:36 - It doesn’t even count as going rogue if you have a weird spear brainwash you. 14:47 - She is awesome. How come she didn’t get her own movie?? 17:55 - I’d be annoyed at the Hulk being a different actor, but I can’t remember much about it. He was a Doctor? 20:26 - “These people may be isolated, unbalanced even…” 25:35 - I’m wondering how much of my excitement was really just for another glimpse at Stark! 26:06 - “Phil? His first name is Agent.” 33:55 - A double decker aircraft carrier that is also able to fly. That’s… incredible! 34:54 - Oh, and it turns invisible too. 41:48 - I forgot about the boomerang shield. Also, where is Thor? 45:01 - There’s Thor and his fabulous deep voice. 47:37 - Shakespeare in the park! 50:44 - I’m surprised Loki didn’t manage to escape with all their in-fighting! They’re on the same team! 55:28 - An enormous green rage-monster. 1:02:43 - I properly love Agent Coulson. 1:05:25 - “I got red in my ledger, I’d like to wipe it out.” 1:15:30 - He has an excellent evil smile, that Loki. 1:18:42 - Seems like Thor just spends his time fighting the good guys! 1:24:35 - Nooooo! 1:29:16 - Everyone left needs to get the rage now. 1:32:37 - He’s a much better Hulk than the last Hulk. 1:34:35 - Why does she suddenly trust him? 1:42:15 - Did his suit just attach itself whilst he was falling? Wow! 1:49:54 - They do say that actions speak louder than words. 1:51:20 - That is so Transformers. The big windy ship flying round the corner of the buildings. 1:53:35 - Who would have thought we would be encouraging the Hulk to smash? 1:57:05 - Where does he keep getting his arrows from? It’s not like he can go and collect them mid-fight. 2:02:11 - He ran out of arrows! 2:09:43 - How can he still be alive after being bounced around by the Hulk? 2:14:17 - I can even forgive the lens flare in the credits.
Ohhh, it was so good! The story was great, but that didn’t even matter. It wasn’t about what was happening really, it was about who it was happening too. The piece is all about these misfits, coming together and having to figure out how to work together to save the world. Loki could have had a much smaller part and it would have worked just as well. There are so many bits to love, so many great lines, so many jokes where they just aren’t taking themselves too seriously. It’s beautifully done.
I only have two complaints that in other films would be massive but in this one, they are minuscule. Firstly, the weird alien ship thing at the end came straight out of Transformer. Wiggling its way across the sky and smashing up buildings as it went, I could have been watching any of the three Transformers movies with that. Plus, of course, Joss Whedon completed his trademark move of killing off someone we all care about. I get it, they needed something to actually “avenge” but did it have to be so!
Other notes, I liked this Bruce Banner a lot more than the original, they should go back and remake the film. I also want Scarlett’s character to get her own film because she’s about as brilliant as female characters get. I particularly liked it when she was extracting information from people without them realising it. I wasn’t convinced that they all would welcome back Archer Man without questioning what happened before, but he didn’t turn rogue again, so they knew better than me.
Finally, the Hulk smashing Loki around like a toy… possibly the greatest thing I’ve ever seen. Ever. “Puny God.”
It deserves so much more than just a five.