- Title Severance
- Director Christopher Smith
- Year 2006
- Run time 1hr 29m
- Genres Thriller, Comedy, Horror
- Tagline The company is making cutbacks
Following a boom in military arms sales, the team at Palisade Defence are rewarded with a team-building weekend in the wilds of Eastern Europe. But what begins as a corporate jolly rapidly descends into a deadly nightmare as they are pitched into a terrifying fight for survival against a forgotten army of bloodthirsty maniacs armed with machetes, flame-throwers, machine guns and a thirst for revenge.
This was on the iPlayer, and I liked the look of it but was in two minds about watching it. Danny Dyer isn’t exactly a popular chap, but I wasn’t sure whether this should affect how I feel about the film or not - particularly before I’d even seen it. In the end, I gave it a go.
****00:01:05 - It’s about time that someone running through a forest went smack into a tree. 00:04:31 - Already, I am wondering why Danny Dyer is even on a coach with these people. 00:06:23 - Hungarian bus driver knows the English for “no smoking” and “Bob Marley.” 00:06:52 - Ugh, they’re going paintballing. Rubbish. 00:08:40 - He’s a very angry bus driver. 00:10:06 - “I’m not walking anywhere.” I like that guy, even though he is clearly supposed to be the annoying one. 00:11:13 - Passport control for bears! Hehehe! 00:12:34 - If ever there was an argument for travelling light and always wearing trainers. 00:15:22 - There is a bear! 00:17:34 - I like that she told the other guy to look after him but has ended up doing it herself anyway. **00:19:37 **- Definitely a message for not doing drugs here too. 00:22:28 - They look significant. Prisoner files or something.** **00:23:16 - Wow, a whole cheese! 00:23:50 - Who brings lightbulbs on a paintballing trip?** **00:30:06 - This is like a modern version of ghost stories around a campfire. 00:32:57 - “Keep digging, we can still see ya.”** **00:37:25 - Thunder and rain. Must be about to turn into a horror movie.** **00:40:33 - “No rambos.” That can only have been aimed at one person.** **00:44:06 - My god, I really hate paintballing.** **00:46:03 - That is gross!! But also quite awesome. 00:51:16 - Hehe, brilliant. Just like he said would happen when his head got cut off.** **00:53:48 - It is quite stereotypical for the boss to be the useless cowardly type. 00:56:45 - Lightbulbs, and now a hammer and nails as well! Gordon is useful! **00:58:07 - **She’s quite lovely really. I suppose she will save the day. **00:59:37 **- He said: “I’ll be right back.” Oh no! Hasn’t he seen Scream? **01:03:54 **- Why would the bad guy let them find him? He’s lost the element of surprise now. 01:08:49 - Still, 20 minutes left. Film can’t be over yet. 01:09:38 - Oh righto, now it’s not just one bad guy, it’s an all out war. **01:12:52 **- Ah, the beginning guy running into a tree was actually from the end of the movie. **01:13:37 **- Don’t tell me, the boss gets to be a bit of a hero in the end. **01:17:17 **- They look like ninjas. **01:22:16 **- See, if I was running away from ninjas, and found a scary looking foreign prison camp type place, I wouldn’t go in. **01:25:54 - Do they know they are sat on train tracks? It would be quite something to survive all that then get squished by a train. **
This film had me all confused. It was clearly trying to be a modern take on a slasher film, with a tiny political edge, in the form of it being people from an arms company. However, I couldn’t quite work out where it was pitched. At times it was almost a satire, particularly the head rolling bit, and the leg in a fridge thing. At the same time, although there were some funny lines, it wasn’t exactly a comedy either. I wasn’t sure where to place it and that left me a bit uncomfortable throughout. It was a good story though, and despite some of the obvious stereotypes, it wasn’t annoying in the way some horror films can be.
Rating: 3 / 5