Paper jam

Why don’t printers ever just work?

If I had my way, I would never have to print anything, but that is a different problem. Faced with having to print something, why does a printer, whose sole job it is to print, splutter to a halt?

It’s not even a silent, resolute, protest of “No, I’m not doing that.”

The annoying red light blinks at you until you have to roll up your sleeves and get involved. Then the printer gets all sarcastic, saying: “Haha, there’s no paper stuck in that door, silly. Oops, look, now you’ve torn it. Still not having your print out, nah, nah, nah.” At this point, your hands will usually be smudged with black ink, that you then brush across your face.

Mr C recently remarked on the outstanding technical ability for us to produce a show with a guest on Skype from Denmark, routed through Finland for the better broadband, streamed up to a server in Dublin, and displayed to people across the world.

Yay for technology.

Now if only we could put ink on paper without a mammoth battle, I would be happy.

P.S – I apologise for the rant. I just had a fight with a printer that led to me inadvertently punching the wall. My knuckle is red and I am not impressed.

P.P.S – The printer in question is actually quite good because once you have bashed it into submission, it picks up where it left off a few pages back, so you don’t end up missing anything. Cool. Just don’t break in the first place.

7 thoughts on “Paper jam

  1. Grrr Printers Grrr!

    They are really annoying for me too… I would love to get rid of them too.

    The problem is that often you need to print things too quickly. But in some ways I fantasize about a world where you could send a file to the printer on the computer just like you do now and then the print job would come back to you in the post. Which would be fine until you realised you had made a mistake and needed to print it again.

    I actually think this service might already exist!

  2. My father is very pleased that I am coming home because he is stressed that his printer (which was my printer before I left) prints out a test page every time he turns it on.
    I have explained to him that its an annoying HP feature that requires you to scan the test page after you change the ink cartridges so it can test the print head alignment, but this ‘scanning thing’ is beyond him so its up to me to save the day.
    Considering I haven’t been home for 16 months I wonder how much paper he has wasted waiting for me to return.

  3. Grrr Printers Grrr!

    I could have just said that really, it would have saved time 🙂

    Considering I haven’t been home for 16 months I wonder how much paper he has wasted waiting for me to return.

    Hehehe! I like to think he will have saved it all as well, to show you, just in case you need to see it. A massive pile of test pages!

  4. Nope, printers are just as annoying in Denmark – especially when they give you errors in Danish!

    Ah-ha! I was going to start this post – why do printers hate me? But I figured it was not just me and lots of people would suffer the same. I am correct in this assumption!

  5. Now Christine, repeat after me, “Printers are your friend. They are not evil”….

    Hmmm. Co-rrelate those people who are in I.T . and see what types of printers they have. I swear by my “Moses was just a lad when this thing first came out” Samsung Laserjet printer, but my younger brother compains a lot about his HP laser, again about all the test pages it prints out. The odd two sheets of paper sticking to each other (humidity problem) causing a paper jam is about the only real issue I have with it, but that is just a quick barometer (It is a Trullimeter for the weather) will warn me that I might have issues.

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