I’m supposed to be a fan

You know, I was so excited that Big Brother was back on our screens. Looking forward to the opening credits, to seeing the lunatics they’ve picked out and, of course, the new diary room chair.

A few days in, and I’m bored.

It’s not the people, though, I think previously, they would have been very entertaining. It’s me. I’ve changed.

It makes me so angry when they won’t listen to each other and end up arguing over nothing. I wish they would just take a step back and see what is actually being said.

Every year, a colleague and I talk about Big Brother constantly. Every day: “Did you watch it? What did you think?” How am I going to turn round and say: “Well, actually, I think I’ve grown out of it?”